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Mind

Thoughts on Suppression – The Psychologist

Thoughts on suppression | The Psychologist

Thought suppression commonly refers to the act of deliberately trying to rid the mind of unwanted thoughts (Wegner, 1989). In early investigations researchers demonstrated that the suppression of a particular thought often resulted in the subsequent increased return of the unwanted thought, a phenomenon termed the ‘rebound effect’ (Wegner et al., 1987).

Originally posted 2016-12-17 12:40:16.

Mind

Thought Suppression

Don’t Think About It

Just don’t think about it. Trying to stop smoking? Avoid eating sweets? Get over a relationship? Stop thinking about it. This is surprisingly bad advice. Suppressing thoughts may actually be counter-productive. Don’t think about white bears. While reading the rest of this blog post, do not think about white bears.

Originally posted 2016-12-17 12:25:59.

Mind

Toxic People: 12 Things They Do and How to Deal with Them Posted by Karen – Hey Sigmund

Toxic People: 12 Things They Do and How to Deal with Them – Hey Sigmund – Karen Young

We have all had toxic people dust us with their poison. Sometimes it’s more like a drenching. Difficult people are drawn to the reasonable ones and all of us have likely had (or have) at least one person in our lives who have us bending around ourselves like barbed wire in endless attempts to please them – only to never really get there.

Originally posted 2016-12-12 12:46:40.

Mind

How to Detox Someone Out of Your Life by Dr. Karuna Sabnani

What To Do When You’ve Outgrown Someone

Detox has become a fad word lately. Do a few shakes, stay off the booze, stop processed food, have a few green juices and you feel brand new. This may come as a surprise, but toxins aren’t just found in air pollution or your poor food and drink choices.

I had to copy and paste this article because it think it is so important to read so I wanted to make it easy for you to do so.


 

“Detox has become a fad word lately. Do a few shakes, stay off the booze, stop processed food, have a few green juices and you feel brand new.

This may come as a surprise, but toxins aren’t just found in air pollution or your poor food and drink choices. To really feel that desired sense of relief, clarity and glow, you have to look at all parts of your life. You must evaluate what is toxic specifically to you and cleanse out what doesn’t work. You have to not only look at what you are eating, but what (or who) is eating you.

The first step is to recognize if a person is not good for you, or if you need to change something within yourself to deal with the person.

Here are some examples of toxic people, shared by peers and patients:

1) That ex-partner or lover that you obsess over. A love interest that pays you no attention. You can’t move forward, yet you can’t be with the person.

2) A “friend” that you always feel drained after spending time with and almost need therapy just to recover from.

3) Any person in your life that is hyper-critical, judgmental or abusive. The naysayers, people who tell you all the reasons you can’t rather than the reasons you can.

4) Anyone that, when you take a step back to assess, you dread speaking to or meeting up with for any reason.

5) A person that spreads rumors and gossip behind your back but is nice to your face.

6) An employee, business partner or client that brings negativity and stress to you and your work on a regular basis.

7) A family member who is an energy leech, puts you down constantly or is generally toxic. (This one is tricky, but do your best and apply tight boundaries with tough love if nothing else)

Just like with any cleanse program, you need to know yourself. Are you a “cold turkey” person, or do you need a gradual process? If you are the cold turkey type, you press delete and that’s it. History. If you are a gradual process person, you need a cleanse action plan in place.

In this modern world of technology there are hundreds of ways to stay connected, even when you don’t want to be. If you don’t have self-discipline these days, you have the plight shared by a friend recently, “I now have 15 ways to be haunted by this person every minute of the day.”

If you focus on something it grows, so the key is take your focus off of it.

Tips to get you started to cleanse a toxic person out of your life. Apply the ones that are relevant to your specific situation:

1) Don’t talk to the person. If this is not possible permanently, do it for a set amount of time and figure out plan to lessen your contact with this person on a long term basis.

2) Don’t look at the person’s Facebook page or anything related to the person on Facebook. Turn their notifications off in your newsfeed. If you don’t trust yourself to do this, delete the person from Facebook.

3) Don’t talk about the person. You are trying to set a new pattern. If this is too difficult and you need some support, talk to only one trusted friend or therapist.

4) Avoid places frequented by this person. Avoid places that you make you nostalgic about the person. Avoid any toxic environment period.

5) Avoid all social medial platforms updated by the person. If you can’t resist checking this person’s updates, stop following them all together.

6) Don’t listen to music that reminds you of the person. Music triggers memories and makes them more real in the present moment. This is a good time to create new music playlists.

7) Say yes to new people and new situations to refocus your mind in a different direction. Make new friends and find new people to work with.

8) Avoid reading old emails and texts from this person. If you can’t resist doing so, press delete. This applies to photographs too. Fill the void and new found time with things that are good for you.

9) Remove yourself physically from your routine for a day, weekend, or week based on your schedule, to reset in a new environment. Insert a new perspective to your life and ease the cleansing process.

10) Exercise and eat well. Sweat, movement and a good diet helps move the old toxins out of your body and mind.

11) Surround yourself with people and places that love and uplift you.

The next time you feel you need to “detox,” consider looking at more than just your diet and remove toxic people from your life as well.”

 

 

Originally posted 2016-12-12 12:40:29.

Declutter, Mind

Your Closets, Your Clutter, and Your Cognitions
Jennifer Baumgartner Psy.D.

Your Closets, Your Clutter, and Your Cognitions

Organizer Regina Leeds tells all!

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-psychology-dress/201202/your-closets-your-clutter-and-your-cognitions-1


This is a great article and something that I feel will inspire all of us to get rid of stuff that is in our environments that we just don’t need.   You don’t have to necessarily get rid of it but it does not have to be in your daily space or view.

In order for me to be productive and work on multiple projects, I must have a clean organized environment.    It makes my world feel better.

This article and the previous video I posted on clutter is making me think about my junk draw and any draw that I have that is messy.   I want to take baby steps in decluttering.   Join me!

If you have a pretty dress or a nice piece of clothing that someone else could use, let it go.

There is a sense of relief in our minds when we are organized and so for me that is what is driving my research on how the mind is affected by the clutter around us.

-Rosemary

Originally posted 2016-06-17 00:47:06.

Mind, Reprogramming the Mind

How to practice shifting your thoughts The meaning of life is made, not found.
Dr. Robert Holden asks us to reconsider the meaning we place on life events.

http://www.mindful.org/shift-happens/

How to practice shifting your thoughts

The meaning of life is made, not found. Dr. Robert Holden asks us to reconsider the meaning we place on life events.


This is a great article but what I liked about it the most is this paragraph.
-Rosemary

“The meaning of life is not a search—it is a choice. Meaning is not found in things; meaning is what you make of things. The world means nothing by itself. You give it all the meaning it has. Thus, the meaning of life is a choice you make, not just once, but every waking hour of your day. 

Life is like art—it is all about interpretation. The moment anything happens to you, you interpret a meaning for it. The meaning you vote for then governs your perception, your thinking, your faith, your choices, your feelings, your behaviors, everything! Whenever you elect a new meaning, this changes everything. Here is a great key to healing and success.

 An event occurs, and it is your interpretation and meaning that decide everything thereafter. “There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so,” wrote Shakespeare.”

Originally posted 2016-06-15 10:48:18.

Gratitude, Mind

The Science Behind Gratitude
(and How It Can
Change Your Life)
By Derrick Carpenter, MAPP

http://www.happify.com/hd/the-science-behind-gratitude/

Being happy takes work!   I know a lot of people don’t get this but it does.   We need to practice certain things on a daily basis like gratitude.   Gratitude is not easy for some of us when we are constantly thinking about what we don’t have.   We need to try to focus more on being thankful for what we do have.

You know, we all have a story and we all have issues.   Sometimes the issues do get in the way of us being able to be thankful.   To be thankful of those things that we do have.

If I wake up cranky and in a bad mood it is hard to think about being grateful but it is something I must practice.   When you are going through a tough time in your life, it is very hard to think about what you do have when you don’t have what you do want.

This is a great article to help you start your gratitude journey.   Let’s practice this together!

Read the entire article by going to the link but I did copy and paste some of what I really liked below.

I like how the author says to have a Gratitude Journal.   That is something I am thinking of doing because it will help me stay focused on being thankful.    There are tons of apps that can be used for journaling and they do have passcode protection so that no one has to read your stuff.

Having a gratitude jar is also a great idea.   This can help you take action every day or very often to put something in the jar.

 

“Freshen Up Your Thanks

The best way to reap the benefits of gratitude is to notice new things you’re grateful for every day. Gratitude journaling works because it slowly changes the way we perceive situations by adjusting what we focus on. While you might always be thankful for your great family, just writing “I’m grateful for my family” week after week doesn’t keep your brain on alert for fresh grateful moments. Get specific by writing “Today my husband gave me a shoulder rub when he knew I was really stressed” or “My sister invited me over for dinner so I didn’t have to cook after a long day.” And be sure to stretch yourself beyond the great stuff right in front of you. Opening your eyes to more of the world around you can deeply enhance your gratitude practice. Make a game out of noticing new things each day.

Get Real About Your Gratitude Practice

Being excited about the benefits of gratitude can be a great thing because it gives us the kick we need to start making changes. But if our excitement about sleeping better because of our newfound gratitude keeps us from anticipating how tired we’ll be tomorrow night when we attempt to journal, we’re likely to fumble and lose momentum. When we want to achieve a goal, using the technique of mental contrasting—being optimistic about the benefits of a new habit while also being realistic about how difficult building the habit may be – leads us to exert more effort. Recognize and plan for the obstacles that may get in the way. For instance, if you tend to be exhausted at night, accept that it might not be the best time to focus for a few extra minutes and schedule your gratitude in the morning instead.

Make Thankfulness Fun By Mixing It Up

University of Rochester partners in crime Edward Deci and Richard Ryan study intrinsic motivation, which is the deep desire from within to persist on a task. One of the biggest determinants is autonomy, the ability to do things the way we want. So don’t limit yourself—if journaling is feeling stale, try out new and creative ways to track your grateful moments. (Happify offers an endless variety of gratitude activities to choose from.) My fiancée Michaela decided to create a gratitude jar this year. Any time she experiences a poignant moment of gratitude, she writes it on a piece of paper and puts it in a jar. On New Year’s Eve, she’ll empty the jar and review everything she wrote. When a good thing happens, she now exclaims, “That’s one for the gratitude jar!” It immediately makes the moment more meaningful and keeps us on the lookout for more.

Be Social About Your Gratitude Practice

Our relationships with others are the greatest determinant of our happiness. So it makes sense to think of other people as we build our gratitude. Robert Emmons suggests that focusing our gratitude on people for whom we’re thankful rather than circumstances or material items will enhance the benefits we experience. And while you’re at it, why not include others directly into your expression of gratitude? One Happify activity involves writing a gratitude letter to someone who had an impact on you whom you’ve never properly thanked. You could also share the day’s grateful moments around the dinner table. The conversations that follow may give you even more reasons to give thanks.”

Originally posted 2016-06-14 11:57:28.